Welcome My Friends and Enemies ... I have made a number of changes in my world as a writer and father. This blog, which is so new to me, will now replace the columns on my website - www.gjtsimpsonworld.com ... I am incorporating the blog as a way to get my thoughts to the masses faster than I could by using the columns section on my website. I am hoping that this new venue will allow me a lot more freedom than my column gave me.

As a father a lot has changed in my world, some good, some others much more devastating. As anyone who knows my history over the last bunch of years know that I have preached from day one that my being a father has been my greatest achievement. I have been divorced from my ex for almost ten years and our two kids together are 14, my daughter Cree, and my nine year old son Logan. As of last month my 14 year old spoiled daughter has decided that she now wants to live with her mother, PERMANANTLY! DAYUM! She packed her bags, called her Mom and BAM, gone she is.

Folks you might as well had cut my heart out with a butter knife. No one could have ever told me my first born would choose her mother over me and yes that's exactly what she did. And, since that moment I've questioned everything I've ever done as a father. Was I to demanding? Did I expect to much? Did I really create this selfish little girl who wants the easy way out of every difficulty? Cree flunked Geometry and received her first F. I was livid at her and her mother who says its no big deal lets got to Disney World. Silly me! Firm Daddy compared to fun Mommy and I'm surprised. Silly, silly, silly.

But it still hurts and I haven't gotten even a phone call since she left. Fourteen years of drama, trying to do the right thing and its all over. Writing and jumping on my brothers who are not a steady presence in their children's life, no matter the relationship with the Mom and look what happens to me. I guess the biggest pain is knowing that just two weeks before this all happened my daughter wrote me and her Mom a letter saying that she wanted to stay with me during the school days for the school year so that she could buckle down and try to bring her grades up. WOW, what a complete change!

Everyone close to me (and there are not many) keeps telling me it's just a stage but I don't see it. She's just being a teenager, don't make a big deal out of it. YEAH RIGHT! My heart hurts and I wonder how long will it be before my only son decides its easier to live with mommy and all of her money than with poor struggling Daddy. WHERE DID I GO WRONG? I won't lie to everyone reading this, I have no clue whats going to happen next. What do I do the first time Cree calls? Days, weeks, months or even years from now when she calls wanting to say hello? Do I turn the hurt off and just start loving her as a father should? Better than that, can I do that? Every night after putting my other two kids to bed I wonder what in the hell am I doing? When will they turn their backs on me? Is being a father even necessary today or does all a kid need is a Mom and an every other weekend Dad? Someone please help me understand this drama!

Or am I just on my own as a divorced father, who once had joint physical custody of his two beautiful kids and now as they get older my 'place' in their world is not needed anymore? Ten years of joint physical custody that kept me from traveling, taking promotions, or working too late or taking some gigs just because I didn't want to not be a part of my kids world. Never wanted to be the father you hear about on TV and in every magazine that swears the reason our black kids are doing so badly is because there is no father at home. My kids have and I guess had a father. My daughter and her mother have gone from fighting all the time to, as my son says - best of friends. I have gone from being the demanding, disciplined, loving and attentive father that used to brag that his oldest girl talked to him about everything, to an outsider that doesn't even deserve a phone call. DAYUM!